Monday, November 13, 2006

Apathy and Discouragement

The past few days I have really felt apathetic, and occasionally discouraged, about this weight loss journey. It's so weird to feel that way when not to long ago I was chatting about how upbeat I was and how I actually had goals in mind. I was reading my friend Arlene's blog this morning and she is feeling similar to me.
Looking back on it, I can't help but wonder when the feeling started creeping up on me. Was it while I was spouting inspiration to myself? Have I been lying to myself about how I'm doing and feeling? Quite probably. I have a history of lying to myself about a problem for a while before acknowledging it and doing something.
I had said last night that I would be going to Weight Watchers today. I will go after work and I will be staying for the meeting. I know I need to go, and I know I need the support the meeting will give me. Even if I do need to actually do things like go grocery shopping. That will just have to wait. I don't like the idea of going to the meeting though. I don't want to step on that scale and see the numbers have gone up. I deserve to see them go up though. I just haven't been doing the program. I've just been pretending to do so. But today I just have to look it square in the face and say I will do better next week. I have decided to start the Wendie program next week. I think I need a little more self control and a little more structure to get going than what I have been allowing myself. I'll just follow it strictly for a week or two and see how things go from there.

I CAN do this. I have DONE this before. I just have to look at the previous success, and not the following failure, and keep on going. I REFUSE to fail on this important journey. I don't consider giving up on getting my degree, so I have no excuse to even consider giving up on this.


Tigerlilly said...

We can DO this!!! Its just going to take some good old fashioned hard work... ugh. hehehehe... lets just get off our butts and do it!!!

TC said...

We can do this. I have been feeling a little down and off-track lately but we can do this!

ArleneWKW said...

I also benefit from Weight Watcher meetings. I'm discovering that checking out different lecturers works well for me.


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